Daddy issues

We all have daddy issues, us as men especially. The blessing and curse 

My Dad did the best he could. In that process fortunately & unfortunately I've become him. I get angry, don’t listen and can be hyper emotional in my decisions. But he also taught me passion in my expressions, resilience, that it was ok to cry and that it’s ok to tell your sons you love them EVERYDAY!

My brother, who I would consider someone who fathered me. I looked up to him and thought he was perfect but I was too blind to see he was only a kid himself and immature at the time. He taught me women were transactional, good medicine for pain and naive. But he also taught me to be intentional in your approach, resourceful, and not to waste any relationship because people have value. He taught me to have charisma and be a leader.

Mike my son 🖤 taught me love. Selfless love and sacrifice. He taught me responsibility, unconditional love because of how he always loves me past my imperfections. He shows me that I can love beyond belief. He shows me that I can be consistent. He shows me that I am an amazing father because I raised him well and I'm proud of him. He shows me the value of fatherhood when he's in pain and now that he's beginning to experience the black man experience, he runs to me for relief and I pick him up as his real life savior. He shows me my greatest gift is in my creativity because I created him.

You fathers, you daddy’s… you hurt me but more than that you helped me. You blessed me. Through good and bad moments you gave me opportunities to fight and exercise the overcomer in me. Which gave me the opportunity to change my narrative. I also learned to have grace and understanding because like me you were human - fighting your own battles and doing the best you knew.

We all have daddy issues and sometimes those issues didn’t come from just one father but multiple father figures like teachers, uncles, brothers or authority. Which is why healed and healthy fathers and father figures are vital. It takes multiple men to raise one man. 

I was blessed to have men that loved me, guided me, prayed over me, cried over me and fought for me. Yes they were the furthest thing from perfect and at times their attempts to teach me well pointed me in the wrong direction but that just gave the opportunity to separate the principal in the lesson from the method and use it to my benefit as an adult that sees for himself. Fathers don’t be afraid to raise your kids even if you know you lack, because you have another father that’s helping you, who can use all things for good.